Alchemist Heels

Today I've discovered about myself. I went for landmark forum that was introduced by Katya. I've always wanted to do this for the longest time and If it wasn't for my brother who sponsored me, I wouldn't be able to do  it. Much to my surprise I've found so much things about myself and I'm so glad that I'm alive and that I can do anything and everything in the world. On the first day, which was Friday, I've discovered that I've made my own story, and my story is every time something happened to me, either I got bullied, or being compared with my sister, or anything I would interpret is as me being stupid and that it means i had to be someone else in order to be accepted. So I will always continue to repeat my cycle everytime I'm being stupid i will be a people's pleaser and a chameleon and what not and I will never be happy. Then I've realized that I've been over compensating myself and thus I would do Scythian and everything to make m...

You know I've been watching the biggest loser and similar stories like amazing race and well big bang fantastic baby to make me feel like awesome and into losing weight. Well sometime it does motivate me and sometimes not really. I need to lose weight and I need to at least be 55 kg. though i want to be 50 kg. it seems impossible. now i weight like on and off 68-65 kg. I need to lose like 10 kg by september. jeeesus.. together with the fact that i have to go to uni in the morning early kills me too. sigh. so anyways I'm gonna try my best in september to lose weight by at least 10 kg. I have like 6 more months to go.... so gonna aim to lose atleast 2.5 kg per month. which doesn't sound too bad.... I do want toooo lose weight asap i need to stay motivated and stay focus and well just lose all da weight that i needed too do.. ganbattte. I will achive it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear God, Today I've decided to apply for part time job. Dear God, I pray to you so that I would get an opportunity to get a good part time job that suits my studies and would allow me to earn some decent pocket money, on top of having a great experience for me to build on my future career path. Right now I need your guidance and I need my luck to allow me to work in a place where I would get good pay, great distance from home and great experience for me to put on my resume. Please help me dear GOD. I want to try my best this year. I want to get a first class honours. I'm going to aim high so that even if I do fall I'll fall among the stars. Please open some doors and opportunities for me dear god. It is important to me... Thank you for everything that you've done for me I really do appreciate it god. I love you From your faithful servant

Dear God, Thanks for giving your gift to my cousin's Uncle, Uncle Ali, the gift of foursight. I  trully apreaciate. He mentioned that I will be better in Fashion and I will flourish in Fashion stream. I've talked to my mom, she said it was allright for me to pursue my dreams.My sis said that I should do things that relates to Fashion aswell. Funny that uncle mentioned Donna Karan. So I will try my best to pursue my dreams. as long as I know what it is that I'm going for. I need to stop thinking of bad things and fears. I think this year is the year for me to go big and pursue all of my dreams. I will have to do it sooner or later. So lets do it and pursue the things I want in life. Opportunities are everywhere. Lets do it as much as I can. God thanks for giving the gift to this uncle Ali. I do feel sad for him because he has help a lotof people and i'm wondering if he"s ever sad and be lonely that people just come to him for the reading and not for him. not to ...

I know you're out there for me. Delete the bad stuff come in the good.  Let me in the path of great happiness. Find me Love, Find me gifts.  The side of the creativity that I've yet to encounter.  Good night world.  Find me a definition, Find me LIFE, Find me PASSION... Find me LOVE...

Dear God, I thank you for providing me the path and lead me to Kila's uncle. I thank you for giving him the gift so that he can help others who are in need. Today I've learn a lot about myself. I've seen what the future hold for me, however I will not write about it here. This is because I would like to forget about it. Forget about it so that it'll come true one day. Anyway today I've learn a lot of bad things about me. My personality and everything. The negative part. I need to find myself. I need to know who I am. I need to know what are the things that I'll enjoy. I need to forget to please people. I need to be selfish. I need to pamper myself. I need to give myself priority. Today I was asked to give away the thing that I love most, which is Jinbei, away. It works as a symbol so that I can get rid of my fears, my insecurities and all my bad traits such as emotional, pleasing people, competitive and everything. I need to find the direction I want to head. I...

Dear God, Thanks for helping me out and providing me to the path and to show me the right way. Thank you for clearing my point of view and everything. Dear God, I'm praying to you. I need to get Steven away from my life. Please God. I need him to stay away from me because he has given me such hardship and emotional roller coaster. Even though he has also given me good emotions. I thank you for giving Kila's Uncle the ability to help others. I really and truly appreciate it. Message in a bottle Message in a bottle, As stubborn as you can be, Refuse to let me go, AND you'll still be gunning for me. Message in a bottle, Let me be, Free me from your grip, So that I will free myself from thee. Message in a bottle, Leave me be, Get away from me, So that I can be free. Message in a bottle, I threw you away, In a running river, To drift you away from my life. Message in a bottle, Don't come back, Don't get close to me, Just Forget about me, and leave me be. M...