Alchemist Heels

Dear God, After that night session with mark and james, it made me feel good. I enjoyed every last few moments or minutes that I've had with you that night. THough I have to be honest it is a lot of work whe it comes down to the moments where I have to actually always remind myself to believe in you. I guess Im still afraid of soo many things. Although I've said that I'll leave everything in your hand. I guess I te the feeling of uncertainty. but then again everyone hates uncertainty. God i have to be honest. I feel like there is no one else who can help me with this stuff except for you. You're like the only person whom i can turn too for everything. You know wht god, I'm beggining to think that you don't want me to be in sydney anymore. before that you lead me to sydney, with everyhting going in so smoothly. EVen when it comes to doing honours year. then suddenly when it comes to finding a job and living in sydney. I feel like you strongly don't want m...

Dear God, This year has been such a learning curve for me. There were multiple of struggles that i had to go through throughout all of the time that I've been staying here. Now the biggest struggle is to actually be an adult and be on my own for a while. There's my thesis that is due tomorrow and man how i'm strugling so much to actually try and complete the work. I've been procrastinating a lot. I guess I'm really done with uni life and I just don't want to work anymore and do anymore assignments. I guess I just want to relax chill and just let lose and just move on with my life. There's that struggle with my mom, who apposes the idea of me staying with steven in the same household. Man was i upset. She was very upset at the idea as well. What am I suppose to do with that God. You would know best on what I need to do. Then there's that strugle with actually being with steven. Some days god its really tough to be with him. All I am is just a ball of sa...

Listen to my self. Don't doubt your inner thoughts, Release the insecurities, Believe in your self. Hardworker, Rainmaker, Self fullfilling prophecy, Achiever. Never underestimate yourself, Eat healthy, Live well, Get thin, Get fit. Smile, Find strength, Don't live in such an innocent lifestyle. Love others, Love yourself, Love the wicked in you, Tame the wicked in you. Stop fighting yourself so hard, Just embrace yourself, Just listen to yourself, Just live and breath and accept. Acceptance is key....

He's not perfect . You aren't either and the two of you will never be perfect.  But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can.  He isn`t going to quote poetry, he`s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don`t hurt him, don`t change him, and don`t expect more than he can give.  Don`t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he`s not there.  Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don`t exist but there is always that one guy that is perfect for you  ~ Bob MArley

IN the last couple of months, it has been a lot of ups and downs for me. I can't help but feeling everything really happens for a reason. my relationship with god grew stronger. He continuously builds me up and keeping me centered and helping me to see what is the right way  and how he has build a path for me to follow. Thank you lord for giving me that opportunity to shine and for me to go through all these hard obstacle and making me stronger in the last coule of weeks. I can't help but feeling there is a reason for everything Dear lord, I was wonderign why you ever put him in my path. He's always been there, he has all this great and awesome qualities in a man and i've learned so much with him. Then god, why did you make us become more than friends? I really had a great time and i really enjoyed myself for the first 2 weeks of our relationship. Somehow everything else starts to turn to hell after the first initial 2 weeks. It was really hard for  both  him and I t...

1) Getting better at starcraft 2 game (having the ability to understand the game and executing all the game plays that i've desired, Be able to get into platinum league at least) 2) Getting FIRST CLASS HONOURS (change mindset, be strong, do more work and get it)   Got Second class hon div 1 81 wam. (that's not too bad) 3) Learn a musical instrument well. Either guitar or somethign else like drum or piano. 4) Learn basketball (to understand the game and be able to think strategicly and fix fine motor skillls) 5) Have a stronger character/ mindset so that people can't break me and so that I can think on my feet when i'm being pressured 6) Get a great an awesome first job that I love, in a foreign country 7) Travel as much as i can an visit new places every year 8) Become smarter and expose myself to new discovery and new knowlege 9) Know how to survive in the wild. (READ SAS) understand all the knots and thigns to do like readinga  compass, find food, how ...

So couple months ago i've declared that I was going to lose weight and wanted to achieve 55 kg. Now after 6 months, my weight fluctuate between 56-57kg. I still have about 1 week to left before my brother's wedding so I will achieve it, and strive to lose that remaining 1-2 kg left. Its amazing how things tend to work out when you put your mind into it. ALthough I really want a hot body likehtose korean girls with sexy long legs and curvy body. Like the girls from "Waveya", the pro dance cover girls. Especially in their video gangna style. I'm proud of myself to be bale to lose such a lot of weight within 6 months. My initial weight was 76kg when i first started and i weight atmy heaviest at 85kg back in 2009. Now for the rest of the year, I will maintain and I will achieve 50 kg soon enough. and perhaps after that 45 kg. I can't wait to go back home for abang's wedding and feeling good about myself. I just followed the no carb diet, and exercise everyday ...